If –


If I cooked like Henry Miller I would wear a dirty white apron, work at The Reef, and fuck waitresses in between shifts.

If I cooked like Agatha Christie everyone would want to know who choked whom with the sausage in the dinning room.

If I  cooked like Virginia Wolfe you would all be very afraid.

If I cooked like Franz Kafka I would be a guest chef on Bizarre Foods with Andrew Zimmern.

If I cooked like E. L. James I would be head chef at Hooters.

If I cooked like James Joyce my kitchen would be a mythic mess and it would take me 17 years to make dinner. You would all be in awe and amazed and yet have no idea how to eat it.

Metamorphosis

metamorphosis617

1 1/2 oz Becherovka Liqueur
3/4 oz Lemon Juice
3/4 oz Honey Syrup (1:1)

Shake with ice and double strain into a cocktail glass. Garnish with a lemon twist.

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“if technology is a pimp, our language is its favorite bitch” -panelists at SXSW.

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