There is no Egg in Eggplant


English is a funny language. I have a love/hate relationship with it. Of course, it’s my native language, so it’s what I’m best at. But it has strange rules. It’s inexpressive and shallow words and it’s stilted grammar limit one’s soul to a uni-dimentional existence. I could spend more time with my thesaurus I suppose. I could get over my issue with comma’s, but they seem to have a life of their own. Appearing, willy-nilly, where ever, like, they decided my compositions could, use some help,.

JJ has wonderful concepts for writing but his writing in general is mediocre, at best. (I never wanted to say anything while we were dating. Hell hath no fury like a boy who has been told the truth about his stuff.) He preaches ad nauseum and steals from others, too lacking in self-confidence to show his thoughts or speak in his own voice. Too afraid to show real feelings or a draw a character that has a serious lack of. Too timid to use the quirky words he makes up for his dog. But most writers are, aren’t they? Maybe he should write in Hindi or Hinglish.

I love the courage of writers who just make shit up. Those who are not afraid to use the latest jargon or break the rules. Snigletologists. English says silly things; it’s a difficult child, an unwieldy Philistine.

Why don’t we use these in every day conversation? It would be so much more fun:

  • Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease.
  • Passholes – definition, People that pass you while driving then pull in front of you and then slow down (slower than you were driving)
  • Pigslice (pig’ slys) – n. The last unclaimed piece of pizza that everyone is secretly dying for.
  • Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn’t get it.
  • Spagellum (spa gel’ um) – n. The loose strand on each forkful of spaghetti that beats one about the chin and whiskers.
  • Nerb n. a noun used as a verb. For example: They didn’t language the proclamation very well. nerb, nerbing, nerbed v. the act of using nouns as verbs in a sentence.
  • Snigletologists-people who have nothing better to do than sit around  thinking up sniglets

After all, why do writers write but fingers don’t fing? If vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat? Speaking of food (although I am really writing), here is something t-bud tickling for you…

Puffpot: Sweet Potato Souffle (With Honey-Buttermilk Biscuits)

Sweet Potato Souffle

Nicole Spiridakis for NPR

Makes 6 servings

  • 2 pounds sweet potatoes (about 2 large sweet potatoes)
  • 3 tablespoons unsalted butter
  • 1 medium yellow onion, minced
  • 1 1/2 cups whole milk
  • 3 tablespoons all-purpose flour
  • 6 large eggs, separated
  • 1 cup shredded Gruyere cheese
  • 1/2 teaspoon dried thyme, or one teaspoon fresh thyme
  • Salt and pepper, to taste

Preheat oven to 375 degrees.

Fill a medium-sized saucepan with water and add the sweet potatoes. Bring to a boil, then simmer until potatoes are soft. Drain and mash well to form a smooth puree.

Butter a 2-quart souffle dish.

In a large saucepan over medium heat, melt the butter. Add the onion and saute, stirring occasionally, until soft, about 5 minutes. Meanwhile, in a small saucepan over medium heat, warm the milk until small bubbles appear along the edges of the pan, then remove from heat. Add the flour to the onion and cook, stirring constantly, for 3 minutes. (Do not brown.) Whisk in the milk all at once and simmer, continuing to whisk, until thickened, 2 to 3 minutes. Remove from the heat and add the egg yolks one at a time, beating well after each addition. Add the sweet potato puree, Gruyere cheese, thyme, salt and pepper to taste. Stir until well blended.

In a large bowl beat the egg whites with a pinch of salt on high speed just until stiff peaks form. Using a rubber spatula, fold one-fourth of the egg whites into the sweet potato mixture to lighten it. Then fold in the remaining whites just until no white streaks remain. Pour into the prepared souffle dish.

Bake until puffed and golden, 45 to 50 minutes. Serve immediately.

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