Home Alone


A lazy Sunday. I’ve sat here all day basking in the winter sun that comes through my corner window. My books are all scattered about – on Indian mythology, Harper’s Magazine, cookbooks, Parabola, Folklore in Everyday Life, and my very important APA publication manual. On the table my Lapsang sits cooling, my feet by the fire are warming, my tummy is rumbling.

It’s lovely to be alone. I’ve spent a lot of time, off and on, in the last few years cultivating it like a soul garden. On days like today it’s easy. Learning to be alone is actually quite a skill. It is an important part of togetherness. I often think that some people have difficulties in relationships because they have not learned to enjoy their aloneness when it is hard, when it isn’t a choice.

It’s difficult I admit, and I am not always the best at it. That razor-edge of separateness cuts deep, most often on cold and rainy days or chilly, damp and too-dark nights, when everyone else is loving or fucking, or if they are lucky, both. Sometimes the sun illuminates my loneliness as I watch all the walkers and runners around the lake, deep in secret conversations that I only get a few words of as they pass me by. Words not meant for me. Red cars, bright stars, the smell of wet dog reminds me of my separateness.

My buddha kitty climbs into my lap, purring ‘It’s all an illusion, this separateness. Make soup.’ So I do. Something I have been dreaming up in my alone time.

Spicy Celery Soup with Apples and Mint

  • 1 bunch of celery, chopped
  • 1 onion, chopped
  • 3 small potatoes, chopped
  • 2 cloves of garlic, chopped
  • 1/2 apple
  • 1/2 jalapeño
  • Salt and pepper
  • butter
  • vegetable bullion
  • white wine
  • fresh mint, chopped

Saute the celery and onion in olive oil until it begins to get nice and soft. Season with some salt and pepper, add garlic, jalapeños and potatoes and let simmer until the potatoes begin to soften a bit, say about 8 minutes. Add in a about 1/2 cup of white wine, nothing too sweet. I chose a Viognier. Give it a bit more before you add in your bullion, 2-3 cups of water and apples. Simmer for 10 minutes then using an immersion blender or a regular blender, liquify the whole thing. I like to leave mine with a tiny bit of chunky texture. This is perfect all by it’s self, but it also goes delectably well with a nice garlic, buttery crostini.

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