My friend and I used to brows through Craigslist a lot, finding posts for each other, laughing at the funny one’s, peering like virtual voyeurs into the little windows of peoples lives in Missed Connections. We even attempted to set M4W and W4M up. That was fun. I was browsing at lunch and I came across this post. It resonated with me, right down to the Namaste. Although they are not my words they ring true for me. Although I would hope I would not give up on someone I really loved, maybe one day I will write something like this:
Your fear paralyzes you and causes you to project all of your old stuff onto others. You lash out and withdraw out of your own issues and pain. But you never think about the impact it has on the person you treat that way. You are only wrapped up in yourself and your own desires, or lack thereof. That has caused me a lot of pain. So much that it’s no use staying in touch with you because you will just hurt me over and over again.
When you can put someone else before yourself, you will truly know love. I hope that happens to you at least once in your lifetime, or if you are like this because you loved and lost when you were young, then I hope you find someone to love again. Be willing to open up your heart and give, even to get hurt again. Be vulnerable. That is beautiful. Namaste.
Namaste is one of those exquisite words like Aloha. It can be translated as ‘I bow to you’, but it is a salutation that can be used for both hello and good-bye. It is a greeting that shows respect. Aloha is also used in both coming and going. It’s translation is a little more ambiguous. It generally is understood as ‘compassion’, ‘affection’, ‘peace’ or ‘mercy’.
Everyone has some emotional scars, but some of us, like the person she is talking about it seems, have really nasty ones. The kind that, if you had them on the outside, someone would immediately wonder how you survived. I can’t imagine anyone, except a naive child, who would look at someone with scars on the outside and comment out loud on them, who would judge, degrade or tease them for their injuries. Yet we are willing to do it when they are on the inside.
How many people have you met who are responsible for horrific scars on their own bodies? Most often, I think, it is done by something or someone else. I know I have some pretty nasty emotional one’s and I know that they have made me look repulsive and monstrous at times. In truth, I think it will take a pretty fucking amazing person to look past mine and love me for who I am. I don’t say that because I think I am horrific, but rather because my experience is that people have a difficult time seeing beyond the superficial in the emotional as well as the visual realm. Who will see beyond the ugliness made by painful events that happened to me in my young life? I think it will take someone who is able to see my sublime beauty and accept that my imperfections have helped create that. A rare person. A person who will wake up in the morning and greet me with a Namaste or an Aloha.
Aloha Spicy Coconut and Pineapple Encrusted Paneer
- 1 egg
- dried Pineapple crisps
- Crystalized Ginger
- Chili powder
Crush up the ginger and pineapple, mix together with pepper and chili powder. Beat the egg and dip your paneer in. Roll it in the coconut mix until it is covered and fry it on med-low heat until the out side is crispy (about 1 min each side). Serve with something a little salty like fried rice.